Forever Gone
by DrChristineJ
Summary: Meredith and Derek are happily on Honeymoon, but everything changes when they get a phone call from the hospital, and something has happened. Something very bad!MD!COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

_**Title**_: Forever gone

_**Chapter:** 1_

**_By_:** Der4Mer4ever

Meredith laughed. Her hair was shining in the sun, and her body so beautiful. Derek watched her as she ran into the water. The lake was so near the cottage that Derek could see her from the window. It was their last day on the honeymoon trip, and the weather was fantastic. Derek smiled as he tough about their wedding. He remembered the day he had proposed very well. It had been the most wonderful day of his life. Now he was married to her. The girl from the bar. The broken intern and the love of his life. She was all he ever wanted, all he needed. She was his wife, he was her husband. He went back to reality when he heard the calling him.

"Are you coming? The water is lovely", her head went under the water again, before she once more came up and let the water ran down her cheek. She was happy, he could see it.

"Right on my way", he called back before he walked towards the door and out in the sun.

With a splash he was out in the water too. He duck under the water and swam toward her. She laughs and he could see her eyes filled with happiness. He lent to her, held her and kissed her. It was soft, and quick. She strokes his hair and suddenly she splash water on his face.

"Oh you're gonna feel sorrow for that", he replied splashing back, before putting his arms around her neck and knees and carrying her out of the water and up on the lawn. She laughs even more now.

"I'm not feeling sorrow for doing it", see replied as he laid her down, and sat over her. "I'm not feeling sorrow for doing this", he whisper back in her ear.

He leaned down kissing her again. She was wearing a green bikini, and as he kissed her he started lifting her top of. Her breasts where wet and he stroke them softly before his hands reached the die base of the bikini. He pulled it down before she reached his shorts and pulled it of. Slowly but certainly his fingers slide into her. She grabbed his and felt a touch through her body as he was in. She loved him so much and he loved her too. She wanted more, more, MORE.

Suddenly it started raining. They had been lying in the grass for a time, enjoying everything, and had forgotten what time it was. They ran inside as it starts raining even more. They put on some dry clothes. The clock was around 6pm.

"I'll make some dinner, what do you want?" Derek said.

Meredith smiled. "Surprise me." She went to their bedroom, and Derek shook his head before he went to the fridge to find some food.

As she entrée their bedroom her phone called. She picked it up. "Hello Meredith Gr...Ehhm Shepherd?" She wasn't used to her new second name.

"Hey..Hmm Meredith…"

"Richard, how are you" Meredith was surprised that he called.

"Ohh….humm, I'm, I'm good, good." She could hear that something was wrong.

"Richard, what's wrong?" Meredith said little scared. He would never call them in the middle of their honeymoon if it wasn't important.

"Meredith I really don't want to tell this over the phone, but I want you to know." He took a long pause before he finally decided to tell her something else. He didn't want to be the one to tell her the breaking news.

"Mer…humm…" he didn't come up with anything so he decided to tell Derek first.

"Could I speek with Derek?" Meredith got worried now.

"Richard….he's umm busy, but umm…a second."

She went back to the kitchen and handed the phone to Derek.

"It's Webber, he said it was important", Meredith almost whispered.

Derek looked at her with a "right back" look as he went outside.

"Richard, what's up?"

"Can Meredith…" "No she can't hear us", Derek finished him.

"Umm…okay. Listen. This afternoon Ellis Grey came to the hospital."

"What happened was she hurt, is she okay, does Meredith know?" Derek said anxious.

"No Meredith doesn't know. She...Umm came to the hospital after a..."He took a deep breath before he continued." "A, a suicide attempt…."before he could finish the sentence Derek replied." WHAT? How? Why?" He didn't know how to react.

"Derek, she had stuck a knife into one of her lungs."

"Oh my goodness, how is she, is she alive?" Derek almost spit out the words.

"She's…hum…we operated, but the damage of the lung where…the lung where punctured, and we couldn't fix it….Derek, Ellis died 19.25 this evening."

Derek was silent, Richard was silent. The legend Ellis Grey, she was one of the best surgeons in the country, she was Meredith's mum, she was, was dead. DEAD.

"Ohh, ohh how am I going to tell Mer, she will be all heart broken, oh my god what am I going to say?"

Meredith sat in the living room when Derek came back.

She could see the fear in his eyes; she could see that something was wrong.

"Derek, what did he say…what"

Derek took a seat at the couch, and told her to do it too.

"Okay, Mer first I want you to know that this will probably surprise you a little bit."

He took her hand and looked her in her eyes when he told her what Richard had told him.

When he had told her everything, he just sat there and stroke her over her arm. She was in shock. She didn't say anything. She just sat there staring out of the window.

"Mer, is there anything I can do for you? Is there anything you want?" Yet she didn't say anything.

Derek could see the pain in her eyes. He knew that Ellis hadn't been there for Meredith that much and that he hadn't been nice to her, and that the Alzheimer had been very tuff for Meredith, but she was still her mum, her family, and he knew that she loved her.

"Mer, please say something." Derek put his arms around her and held her tight, and stroke her over her back.

"She's dead." Meredith said looking at him.


	2. Chapter 2

_Title_: Forever gone

_Chapter: _2

_By_: Der4Mer4ever

She was running into the wood. Voices kept telling her the same words over and over.

"Meredith, it's your fault. You should been there and looked after her. You killed her. You killed her."

"NO", she had jelled back. "NO, she killed her selves."

She kept running, but she fell, and fell. She saw her mother in front of her, before she suddenly woke up.

It had been a dream.

Now she lied in her bed and Derek lied besides her sleeping heavily. Still with the

dream in her minds she walked out of the bed, and went to the kitchen. Last night after Derek had told

her about her mother she had broken down, and she had cried for hours. He had held her tight and

comforts her until she had felt asleep. Last night she had cried because she loved her and missed her,

now she hated her. How she just had left her to go to work when she was younger. How she had told her

over and over that she was nothing more than ordinary, that she would never be a great surgeon, that she

would never be happy. And now she had left her, left her for good. "Damn it." Meredith screamed as she

walked outside.

It was only four o'clock in the morning, but the sun was already up. She decided to go

for a walk, and went inside to get dressed up. Derek was still sleeping, and she moved gently not to

wake him up.

"Mer, where are you going?" Damn it, she had waked him up. "Ohh, I'm just going for a walk, I'll be

back soon." Derek looked at her with a worried look. "How are you doing?"

"I'm, I'm great," she said not very convinced. "Do you want me to come with you?" He sat up and

turned his head to what time it was. "Oh, no I'm fine I'm back very soon, you just sleep."

With that she was gone and Derek went out of bed. He knew that she wasn't okay, and she knew it as well.

Outside again Meredith decided to walk the same way she and Derek had a couple days

ago.

Two hours later Meredith was yet not back, and Derek started getting worried. He went looking for her and when he saw her he ran towards her. "Mer, mer are you okay? Did something happen?" He turned her around so he could see her face. "The voices, they are so real." She didn't look at him.

"Mer, what voices?" She turned her head away.

"Derek please leave me alone." She turned her back and started walking back to the cottage. Derek just stood there for a while watching her leave. He didn't know how to get into her. How to make her open up to him.

Her tears streamed down her cheek as she walked inside the door. She decided to go and have a shower before they left. She turned on the shower and stepped in. The hot water felt good and she stood there for a long while, before she suddenly heard Derek entrée the bathroom. She couldn't hide her sobs, and before she knew it, Derek had opened the door to the shower and pulled her out. She didn't fight against him when he carried her to the bedroom, putted a towel around her and held her tight.

"Let's go home," he said.

* * *

Okay. 

This first two Chapers I made very fast and there might be some spelling mistakes, and I apollogize for that.

PLEASE review: like it,dislike it,ideas,and more...please tell me!!

I will update as soon as I can : )


	3. Chapter 3

_**Title**__: Forever Gone_

_**Chapter**__: 3_

_**By**__: Der4Mer4ever_

In the car back home they where both silent. Meredith stared out the window, and Derek had his eyes one the road. Finally back to their house, Derek parked the car and they went inside. It was only two days to the funeral, and Derek and Meredith had a lot to do. As Meredith went into the kitchen the phone called.

"Hello?" It was Izzie.

"Mer, Hey you're home." She could hear Izzie took a deep breath before she continued,

"How are you feeling, I mean with your mother and what happened and everything. Is there anything I can do, we can do for you?" Meredith replied before she could say something more.

"Oh no I'm okay, I'm fine," She knew that Izzie didn't believed her.

"Mer, I'm really sorry about you mother, I know you loved her and..,"

"Izzie, I'm fine, okay? I just need some time to figure things out. I'll see you later. Bye"

"Okay…yeh see you later Mer, take care."

After Izzie had called a numerous of friends and friends of the mother and people from the hospital

called to hear how she was doing. Also some police officers came to talk to her about her mother's

suicide. When she finally where getting to bed Derek came. He took a seat beside her at the bed.

"You're going to bed?" he asked. "Yeh, it has been a long day." Meredith crawled under the quilt.

"Are you going to bed?" she said looking at him. "Yeh, I'm just gonna brush my teeth first.

When Derek lie beside her and stroke her hair, she finally felt a little happy again. She had Derek. He was always there for her. She turned around meeting his eyes. She smiled as he kissed her softly." Good Night Mer," "Nigh Derek." And with that they both fell asleep.

She was running in the wood again. The same voices told her the same things over and over. "You killed her, YOU KILLED HER."

"NO, NO."

Derek shook her back.

"Mer, mer wake up." Meredith opened her eyes looking very confused. "You had a dream," Derek said stroking her over her hair. "Was it the same dream as last time?" Derek looked worried at her. "Oh, yeh." Meredith didn't want him to know about the voices in her dream, but he already knew it.

"It's the voices isn't it?" Derek looked her in the eyes. She looked at her bedroom window before she replied. "Yes. Yes it is." Tears shoved up in her eyes but she blinks them away. Derek laid her tight beside her before they finally felt asleep again.

* * *

Two days later it was the funeral day. Meredith had planned everything and everyone where ready, except she wasn't there.

Derek went to find her, and outside the church she sat on a bench. "They're waiting for you Mer." His voice was soft. He took a seat beside her and held her hand. She looked at him and then she looked down again.

"She really is gone," she said still looking down.

"Yes Mer, she is. Are you okay?" Derek strokes her softly on her back. Meredith lifts her head to look him in the eyes.

She smiled. "Actually I am," she said before standing up. Derek held her hand as they went inside the church together.

This time she meant it to. She was fine. She was married, married to Derek Shepherd. She was more than fine. She was happy. Her mother where finally out of her life. Yet she loved her and will always love her, she was ready to move on. She was ready to her new life.

She was not longer Meredith Grey, the broken scary and damaged girl who tough everything would be fine with a bottle of tequila. She was Meredith Shepherd now, and Meredith Grey was _Forever Gone_ together with her mother!

_The End_

* * *

Alright, so it where only 3 chapters, and first I thought about making the story longer, but it ended very well her.

PLEASE tell me what you think about it.

This is the first fanfic I have wrote, so I made it short, but I will make some new and long stories about MerDer soon : )

Hope you enjoyed it : ) REVIEW : )


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